Nail polish improves work performance….It’s science

This is an actual conversation that I had with my mother.

Me: MOM! This is an emergency! I need to go to Target and I need you to buy me a lot of things!

Mother: laughs Why do I need to buy you things? You’re an adult.

Me: But mother, you see, these are work related expenses. So I shouldn’t have to pay for my work related expenses. Clearly.

Mother: What on earth are these “work expenses” may I ask?

Me: Well I need self tanner, nail polish, hair products, makeup, hand sanitizer and any interesting $5 movies.

Mother: laughs in my face Those are in no way work related.

Me: But they ARE. If I had self tanner, or nail polish or other beauty products I would feel more confident. And if I were more confident, I would not only be happier in the work place but it is practically proven science that confident people get more work done. Also, like, if I get movies I like then I’ll be in a better mood after watching them and I’ll be more pleasant at work! It all makes sense!

Mother: This seems like questionable science….

Me: But don’t you want me to be a confident, strong, young woman?!?!? Is this not important to you?!?!?!?!

Mother: No.

*Update: No one took me to Target. And no one has bought me the random things I want. My life is so sad.

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2 thoughts on “Nail polish improves work performance….It’s science

  1. Oh snap. I think those are totally work related. Sometimes I daydream of painting my nails at work!
    And I love the $5 movie selection. Sadly those are usually my favorite movies! So many John Cusack movies so little money :)

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