American car horns beep in the tone of F… just so you know.

Well my day today started off with a wooden block being thrown at my head, about 45 minutes of screaming/crying (and that was just me! haha), and spilling my entire water bottle all over the kids toys and making them really upset because I had “ruined everything.” And then I was told I was fired for 100 weeks. So, good start :-).

So remember how I was stuck in a rut? Well, I’m now in a slightly different rut. I for some reason am having a complete and devastating lack of anything original or any ideas or anything at all to say. And why say something if it means nothing? So hence, I haven’t been writing at all recently. Not at all.

And then yesterday, someone told me that they wanted me to “write my memoir.” And I was told that maybe I should for 30 minutes each day just work on this “memoir.” My immediate reaction was, uhhhh no. My life is really boring and how could I possibly have anything to say that would be worthy of a memoir? And then I had a momentary crisis where I realized I didn’t actually know what the technical difference was between a memoir and an autobiography and that turned into like 3 hours of researching the differences which led to somehow online shopping and then watching the CLASSIC “I’ll Be Home For Christmas” starring one JTT and Jessica Biel, in a ridiculous situation of trying to get home for Christmas. It was the first time I had watched it since when it had first come out, and WOW you realize how terrible things are that once seemed so amazing.

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ahhhh my school girl crush at his finest…. Although are we really supposed to believe THAT KID is in college? No, you look 13.

Anyway, despite the super excellence of that movie I realized that this “writers block” or lack of original thoughts and ideas is actually more of a constant problem of mine and less of a phase. I have thoughts, ideas, sometimes unreasonably extravagant ideas, just like anyone else. But I don’t really ever notice them. I don’t notice the things that I’m thinking about. I don’t notice a lot of things! I am way too much inside myself to notice a thing! So that’s the current goal, just to notice. Technically, “be more mindful”, which is something I’ve only been hearing practically every single day for the past 3 years, but apparently seems finally necessary now.

I leave with a favorite quote of mine from my absolute favorite comic, “Calvin and Hobbes.”

Calvin: “If people sat outside and looked at the stars each night, I’ll bet they’d live a lot differently.”

Think about it. 🙂

❤ Kelly

You are now allowed to talk about Christmas

I mean, ok we “lost 6 whole shopping days this year” but that DOES NOT MEAN we shouldn’t follow the “Christmas doesn’t start until after Thanksgiving” Rule that I decided was a definite rule many years ago and is probably like a real rule somewhere… I don’t know. So now listen to all the Christmas music, watch ALL the Christmas specials and movies! It’s allowed now, and I won’t yell at you! 🙂

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Best part of Richmond at the holidays 🙂

In the spirit of being Thankful for what I have just a mere 2 days ago I will now go back to being extremely greedy and give anyone interested a sneak peak at my REAL Christmas list for this year.

  • Free Money (I will take not free money as well, obviously, but I would like to find free money cause that sounds more awesome)
  • A REAL JOB
  • The power of invisibility
  • ALL THE BOOKS
  • Things with otters on them

So there it is, the official list! So lets get working on that one right?? All important and totally possible to get so I shouldn’t be disappointed this year.

So Thanksgiving this year was ALL SORTS of different and crazy and stressful and yet not stressful and basically I will not forget this Thanksgiving, ever. But the most exciting part of Thanksgiving (slash actually terrifying) was that I joined Jess & Ash’s Holiday Diet Bet! I’ve seen these bloggers host a “diet bet” before but I was too scared. But in a moment of insanity, (probably brought on by over 14 hours in the car) on Wednesday night I decided to join this little competition that started on Thanksgiving. Jess from Operation Skinny Jeans and Ashlee from A Step in the Right Direction are both bloggers who are on a journey towards living a healthier lifestyle and both of them are amazing! Definitely check them out! But yeah so for those of you who are thinking, “ok cool… what the heck is a diet bet?” let me explain. Basically is this new phenomenon of “social dieting” where a group of people online commit to try and lose 4% of their weight in 4 weeks. It’s actually a really cool idea, once I looked into it and got less confused…. haha But this one in particular is scary to me because it goes from Thanksgiving until Christmas Day! And as I know from endlessly watching/rewatching/obsessing about The Biggest Loser, 4% is actually A LOT!!!! And over the holidays?!! Am I crazy? Well yes, but besides the point. So for these next four weeks that is my focus. So far things are pretty much going the opposite of how I had imagined. But its ok! Because this is keeping me even more accountable, and I need that!

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Well, this was the official weigh in picture for the diet bet. Lets hope that looks a little different in four weeks! Also I just noticed it weirdly looks like I’m wearing some weird dress thing? No, it’s shorts and a shirt. It just really looks unfortunate.

So yeah! That’s what I’m up to. I’m pretty much done Christmas shopping except for CERTAIN PEOPLE WHO ARE IMPOSSIBLE TO BUY FOR (GREGORY <- my brother) so I’m feeling good! I’m ready to completely enjoy the season and do as many Christmasy/Wintery/Holiday things as possible in the next 25 days.

I LOVE HOLiDAYS!

Basically I’m A Ninja with Useless Super Powers.

I am not a very memorable person, I know that. I don’t have any distinctive features, I’m fairly average, nothing to write home about. So I can understand it when people don’t remember who I am. It happens all the time! When asked recently what people first notice about me I put proudly that “They don’t. I seem to appear out of nowhere most of the time as I am stealthy and quite and fairly successful at chameleon skills.” (fact).

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Tragic. But true.

This wouldn’t be a big deal at all but if it weren’t for my super powers of facial memory. I have like the exact opposite of prosopagnosia. Is that a condition? I don’t remember if prosopagnosia has a real diagnosable opposite. Well if it does I have that. For whatever reason I am really good at remembering faces. Names, not so much. Tell me your name for the first time and by the time you have finished saying it I’ve already forgotten. But I recognize faces. It would be nice if this super memory power could be put to use in a more productive fashion but what can ya do.  I also do have supersonic powers of hearing. Someone find a way to combine those things and come up with a really excellent specialized job I can do.

So yeah back to the memory thing. The reason I bring this up is that ALL the time I see people that I recognize. All the time. 95% of the time, I assume that they don’t remember who I am or don’t recognize me at all so I don’t say anything. I always look and smile and then kind of telepathically tell them “Hey, the ball’s in your court now.” And usually that’s where things end.  But recently I’ve seen people, like a family I babysat for a million years ago, an old teacher, someone I met once at an event and we really hit it off and then they were gone. And I don’t really know what the protocol is. Should I be saying “Hi” to these people? Or should I continue to just awkwardly smile and wait for them to leave so that I can go back to being invisible? I really don’t know! Because I know that if someone catches me off guard I’m always all flustered and sound like an idiot, and I don’t want to put anyone in that position. But then do people think I’m being rude by not saying anything? How do you handle this? Basically, how would a normal, functioning adult react in this situation?  Because I don’t want to be rude, but I REALLY don’t want it to be awkward when they are like “Ummmmmm I have no idea who you are but I’m going to pretend to know who you are so you don’t feel like a huge idiot for a little while.”

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This is how I assume most people internally look when they see me and have no idea who the heck I am…..

What are our thoughts on this? I’m starting to lose sleep over this. (not true)

And since my track record is super awesome lately let’s just go ahead and say Happy Thanksgiving! And Happy Hanukah, which for like the first time ever starts on Thanksgiving! Weirddddd. Hopefully I can pull myself together and write at least something before Christmas, so none of that nonsense yet. 🙂

AND FINALLY!!!!!!! A very special and belated birthday to my dear EMILY who is finally 24 as of yesterday :-).

Aren't my friends pretty? <3

Aren’t my friends pretty? ❤ HAPPY BIRTHDAY EM!!!!!!!

That’s all. Enjoy being cold today people. Unless you live somewhere where it is not like 18 degrees.

Stuck in a Rut

So it appears that I seem to be stuck in a rut.

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See that, I’m in that car.

And a pretty large one at that…..And it is in every part of my life! I clearly have not updated this in 1000 million years. My health and fitness “progress?” seems to have stalled if not backslid a bit. Job prospects, not looking good. Especially after my last interview! THAT was awful. I don’t really know what it is exactly that I WANT to do. And so, for some reason, I can’t find the motivation to do something to change all that.

The thing is, I know what I need to do to get out of some of these ruts. But I can’t for some reason. But in other cases, I don’t know what I’m supposed to do! And I’m wedged in pretty tight, so what would you do to get out of a complete “life rut” for lack of an actual term? Or what can I do to get myself motivated?! I would appreciate any suggestions. Cause in addition to the whole stuck in a hole thing it does appear that I have lost roughly 1/3 of any intelligence I may have had at some point. I am definitely getting dumber…. rough times people.

WELP lets not make this ALL depressing and about my sad sad existence. haha Today is Veteran’s Day (which people should really remember everyday) so a huge ‘Thank You’ to all those who have served, are serving, and will serve.

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Hello Brother. This is what you look like from the back.

And here are some fun facts/discoveries/random things that I have acquired recently.

  1. Did you know that only 2% of the ENTIRE WORLDS POPULATION is naturally a redhead? I just find that randomly interesting.
  2. Trader Joe’s sells GREETING CARDS????? And they are awesome! and I may have gotten like 9 of them….I’m stocking up on cards these days. I like having them on hand because I LOVE sending people mail sooo now its easier because I have so many cards to choose from right from my room!
  3. Oh my god, over the weekend I completely made over my bookcase. Because of every single book sale in a 50 mile radius I have come to possess more books than I could ever imagine. This has made for a very large problem with storage. So until this weekend, I just had bags and bags of books piling up in front of the bookcase and it was disastrous. But I took charge and put all my books on the floor (except my Top Shelf books obviously, I knew those wouldn’t change) and picked the books most worthy of placement on the shelf. And then I alphabetized them as is necessary on my bookcase, and I put the rest of the books under my bed so that I can still see the titles so that I do have easy access. Anyway, it was a really proud moment for the gigantic nerd in me.
  4. Kangaroos can’t jump backward!
  5. I have forgotten every single thing that has happened in the past like 10 weeks all of the sudden and I don’t have really anything interesting to say because my life is way boring.
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Is my school not SO BEAUTIFUL! I miss that place….

Adios Kiddos! Help me get out of the cement I seem to be stuck in!!!!

A Weekend in Pictures

I’m too lazy to actually write about what went on this weekend mainly because it is so dark and gloomy and while we survived the “very real scary tornado warning” and I’m not ACTUALLY sure if its raining at the moment, it is just feeling like a curl up in my bed, watch an absolutely ridiculous amount of Netflix, and drink tea. So this is my weekend, in pictures, with some comment for clarification.

FRIDAY:

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So you have to use a little imagination here… PRETEND, this is a beautifully painted picture of Fall Scenery that was painted by NONE OTHER than ME

So what I ACTUALLY did on Friday was I went with my Mother to Saratoga Paint and Sip, but the NEW one in Latham!!! Which I quite liked, the bathroom was painted in chalk paint and they had a little bowl of chalk and I just thought that was really cute. I may be the only person that goes to Paint and Sip who ABSOLUTELY SUCKS at art but I still think its so fun. So do my paintings come out very well? NO. Am I the failure of the class and the one the instructors are always like, “Well… you did your best! And it was fun, right?” Yes. But seriously it is really fun anyone around the 518 should definitely check it out!

Fun to do, even if you are as good as art as I am!!! 

SATURDAY:

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Wolfs Biergarten Oktoberfest Block PARTYYYY!!

Pretty self explanatory. Oktoberfest. Gigantic things of Beer. Beautiful day outside. Rollerskating women carrying gigantic sticks with pretzels. A possible? cross-dresser making dirty balloon hats from the air pump cleverly positioned (and I apologize for such vulgarity on this website… 🙂 ) at her nipple.  Oh and the best part, Weiner Dog Racing.

SUNDAY:

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Ahhhh Proctors…Such a magical place….

Well. On Sunday. I had this special backstage tour of Proctors Theater, which is a gorgeous place to begin with but OH MY GOD. The whole tour I was just slightly hyperventilating. Like just standing on the stage and possibly pretending I was the star of a huge show, was incredible. My favorite was going into the dressing rooms. Because a while ago someone was like.. “Ummm guys, these dressing rooms tables are super boring” and SO now someone decorates/paints/just makes the table really cool for each show that comes to Proctors and after the whole cast/crew signs the table. Like SO COOL. And some of them were so well done.

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No one mourns the wicked….

 So yeah, it was awesome. Also if you live around here and you DON’T take advantage of Proctors slash ALL of the amazing theater and art and everything around here you are missing out… soooo go there. They have cool stuff guys. Seriously!

Best Place EVER!

And THAT was my weekend in a nutshell! Well the exciting bits. I don’t think you really needed to see the like nine million other parts of my weekend where I was completely catching up on HIMYM or yelling at the online class I need to take for the volunteer thing or drunkenly telling strangers that I know who they are through social media (why? Why, Kelly? Why?)

Hope you all made it through Monday! Tell me when it’s Friday please.